I do get defensive. Slowly things have been getting to me. . .
Many attemps to push me down to a saddness I can't really explain
haven't been working, when its hard to knock me down. Usually all the
attemps have been words, or just emotional hurt.
Lately things have been just pilling on top of eachother & there's only
so much situations a girl like me can handle. I shrug a lot of things
off but lately it just seems like a lot on my shoulders.
I'm ready & willing to take a break from most things, FB & aim to start
off. Its like why have you knowing what I'm doing when you can text me &
ask ?! I don't bite I just wanna feel that I'm still included in your
life. But what really is doing the most damage is my thoughts it self,
they tend to slowly break me down more than anyone eles could. That
feeling I once had with me against the world has now turn to a weird one
with me vs. Myself.
Feeling like you've been left behind in some sort doesn't really help so
much. Friends & who really wants to remain that is the certain situation
I'm having a cross roads with. Tho I know I have solid friendships with
a couple there ones that I thought where solid that have been questioned
& slowly but surly turning to lost liquid.
I want to get away from a couple of things, get my mind back to place &
back to its positive side. Believe me things will get better.
Excuse this shity post. Blog is not towards anyone just a battle between
me & my mind.