everything happens for a reason, Dating chronicles part 1
Sunday, August 29, 2010

This change with summer leaving and fall coming is really getting to me. Maybe im being emotional cause i do need to vent but with summer in affect ive let loose and really opened up to people and i normally shut people off before they can know me. Idk what made it different this year, i have no idea what made me change. I look back on how i used to be and it far from the girl i am now, which is lots of improvement.
This summer has brought me summer loves but ive ended them cause plain and simple I was scared of any kind of commitment or they were not in it for right reasons. Im happy i decided to try the dating scene again since its been a year that i haven't, simply cause i wasn't ready, i wanted to try and love myself before i could ever love someone else its a given. Its not that i hated myself but i was just filled with lots of insecurity and now i can truly say back then i was at 30% confident with myself and now im like at a 85%, ive improved a lot and i really learned about myself more. I try to block everyones notion of me whether good or bad i wanted to work on me for me, not for anyones liking. Back on the dating scene was interesting, dinner dates, movie dates or just simple walk around the park/pier was sweet and just helped me learn about what i like and what i didnt. Some of them were misses and one of them were a hit but to bad the "hit" is leaving off to college so im back at square one, great experience tho. I like to hold my freedom because it keeps me focused on my future goals i don't want distractions. Maybe thats why i dont try to label anything because it just brings trouble in the mix. One great quilty i have is being able to deal with mysef when i feel depressed i know i could bring myself up from a fall, im greatful im not one of those people who have to be with someone in order to feel worthy or good enough for the world, there dependent of others rather than indepent.
Ive only been in one relationship and this relationship wasnt one of your tridtional ones which made the process even harder, but thankfully that ended and it made me come out stronger and have a better outlook on it. Ive improved myself better this includes my over all look and mindset. So when im on dates i could tell if there in it for some wrong reason or for something real, guys play games ive been aware and able to tell between the players and the non ones. You always have to go in it with an open mind and not just focus on one type. do expect another date post :) other than that enjoy your day bloggers

with love dianav.

La Bella Lost

18 years of age, humble soul with divine skills and hard to read like graffiti. Fashion is my major & art is my life, creativity runs through my blood. Blogging to express my feelings & take on things, kicks major butt on problems and overcomes them with such grace. A badass with a sweetheart enjoy bellas!

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